Get With The Family Passion Program
by Terri Bynoe

In his 1980 release, the eternally youthful rocker, Rod Stewart, told us we need "passion." "Even the president needs passion," Mr. Stewart said. Heck! He didn’t have to tell me that in 1980!! I was a college freshman and I was full of passion! I had passion for knowledge, a passion for the unknown, and a passion for life in general literally permeated my very being.

Fast forward to 2006. While I am now what most would classify as middle aged, I still think I "got it". (I understand this is part of denial). My days of passion as it was known to me in days past are, well, let's just say that it was my Passion that got me to where I am today, the exhausted mother of three energetic sons.

But believe me, there was a time when I had more Passion than you can shake a stick at, and it manifested itself as my husband and I began popping out sons back to back. Afterward, we began sleeping back to back. Can’t say the same for Mr. Stewart though. I understand his Passion is still going strong. At sixty years of age, he is again a new father. Practices what he preaches, that Mr. Stewart!? Well you go Rod. Although I have to say that I would like to see Mr. Stewart's Passion after a colicky 3-month old has kept him up all night. That hair would stand on end without any gel, and as for his Passion? Well, let's just say it would most likely sit down, metaphorically speaking.

(Never mind me I am just being a hater, but I know you were thinking the same thing.)

Back to my Passion. I have come to the conclusion that it is high time for me to rediscover it. Yes, I am referring to THAT kind of Passion. I owe it to myself, my mate and yes, my children. What relationship ever suffered from a little Passion? After all we have no trouble being affectionate with our children, so why not our mates? How is it beneficial to my children you say? Although we parents sometimes avoid showing affection for one another in front of our children, seeing parents kissing, hugging or sharing a laugh conveys closeness and helps children feel secure. By observing it in their parents, there's more of a chance that they will share the same affectionate moments in their future relationships.

As we hustle between the laundry, soccer games, late night diaper runs and PTA meetings, it is very easy to become disconnected from our sweeties and the Passion that initially brought us together. We have so many demands, and at times intimacy with our mates is like adding just one more demand to the pile. To be honest and keep it simple, we are tired. Yes men, nothing personal, we are just plain worn out. I know you do not understand this phenomenon, as my husband has explained to me many times that men are never too exhausted for the Passion.

But let's be even more honest here. We find the time and energy to do everything else we want to do right? Or at least we find the energy to do the things we feel we have to do. So when did keeping the fire going in our relationship fall off the list of things we had to do? I don't know, but it's time to make the decision to put it back on, and what better time of year to do that than February -- the month of Passion!

So next time you think you're too tired for the Passion, just make up your mind to pursue it anyway. After all, once we women put our minds to something, watch out for the fireworks! Put on some old romantic Barry White tunes (or find Mr. Stewart's "Passion" in an oldies store) and get with the Passion Program. Increasing the Passion in one relationship is bound to also increase it in another, so you don't have to wonder if it's worth the effort.

Oh! And one tip. If you're not serious about getting with the Passion Program, the object of your Passion will figure it out pretty quickly if you show up in some of those comfy "mommy panties" you like to wear. So do yourself and your Passion (and his) a favor and replace them with something that actually says Passion. Get a babysitter, and throw yourself into the event with the same kind of reckless abandon that got you into this situation in the first place!

_______________
Terri Bynoe earned a BA from the University of South Carolina with a concentration in Psychology while raising 3 boys. She puts her professional training and keen sense of "what makes people tick" to good use in her home, community and anyplace else where she can edify and encourage others. Together with her husband, an emergency room trauma surgeon, Terri serves on several non-profit and charitable boards and is making a positive difference in her Columbia, South Carolina community.